We in the manosphere spend a lot of time talking and writing about “what’s wrong with the womenfolk”. And there’s plenty wrong in the sexual marketplace that’s resulted at the hands of women.
But that doesn’t mean women carry all the blame. Herewith, the reasons why men fail with women.
1. SHE IS YOUR MISSION. This is all wrong, a blatant violation of Roissy’s Third Commandment. A woman is not supposed to be your mission. Your mission is your job/career, your pastimes and hobbies, and your lifestyle. A man does not get a woman and then fashion his life around her. He creates a life for himself and then makes a willing woman a part of that life.
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2. YOU’RE LOOKING IN THE WRONG PLACES. Good places to meet women are clubs or activities at which you have common interests; through friends of friends, and through civic societies and public/local interest groups. Night spots and clubs can also be good places to meet women but that’s widely variable and dependent on multiple factors. Bad places to meet women are at church and at work. Also, sitting back and being passive is not the best way to meet women either – allowing yourself to be set up on dates, for example. Maybe you are barking up the wrong trees.
3. YOU DON’T LOOK YOUR BEST. You’re overweight and/or out of shape. You don’t dress well, your haircut is crappy, and your teeth are yellowed and stained. You have bad breath or B.O. Fix those outward issues. REALLY fix them.
4. YOU’RE TIMID AND APOLOGETIC. You don’t project confidence or dominance. You don’t have to be arrogant; but you don’t have to apologize for your existence either. You don’t pursue what you want, nor even have the confidence to believe you deserve it. You put up with disrespectful behavior from others. You don’t stand up for yourself.
5. TOO MUCH BETA BEHAVIOR. You pedestalize and supplicate. You ask instead of assert; you seek approval instead of decide and execute. You proceed with caution instead of boldness; you subordinate what you need to what others would like. You apologize too much. Instead of pursuing what you want, you explain to her why you want it. You lean in; you smile too much. You talk too much; and when you do talk you’re excitable and neurotic, not calm and even-keeled. You do everything too fast, not slowly, deliberately and purposefully.
6. YOU’RE NOT PAYING ATTENTION. Are you aware of what others around you are doing and saying? Do you know the indicators of interest? Are you looking for them and respond to them? Do you bail out when you don’t see them? Conversely, do you know the indicators of disinterest and are you bailing when you see them? Are you giving the attention you need to your game, your social life, your social intelligence, and your friends? Are you mindful about the vibe you’re putting out?
7. YOU’RE PAYING ATTENTION TO THOSE WHO DON’T WANT IT OR DESERVE IT. This dovetails with point number 6. Do you know the indicators of disinterest and are you bailing when you see them? Are you giving too much attention to women who aren’t showing you sufficient interest? Most women are not going to be attracted to you for whatever reason. Waste no time or resources on them. The minute you see IODs, NEXT. The minute you have any doubts about whether a woman wants you, NEXT.
8. YOU’RE NOT READY TO GET BACK IN THE GAME. Maybe you’re really busy on a work project. Or you have a lot of other things going on with an intramural sports team; or some other pastime. Or you’re recovering from a breakup. Don’t jump back in before it’s too soon. Heal yourself up; then get back into the game.
